In the Kdrama, It’s Okay To Not Be Okay, the lives of two brothers become entwined with that of a troubled children’s author. Kim Soo-hyun is Moon Kang-tae, an orderly at a psychiatric hospital and the primary support of his autistic, older brother, Moon Sang-tae (Oh Jung-se). Go Moon-young, portrayed by Seo Ye-ji, is the author of dark, children’s fairy tales and suffers from a personality disorder. Throughout the drama, Kang-tae, his brother Sang-tae, and Moon-young must learn to care for and rely on each other amidst emotional struggles and adversity. However, a dark past threatens to destroy their path to healing and happiness.
- Series Title: It’s Okay to Not Be Okay (Korean: 사이코지만 괜찮아)
- Starring: Kim Soo-hyun, Seo Ye-ji, Oh Jung-se, Park Gyu-young, Kim Joo-hun
- Written by: Park Shin-woo
- Directed by: Jo Yong
- Network: tvN
- Where to watch in the US: Netflix
- Year Released: 2020
- # of episodes: 16
- KafeNook Rating: 4.9 sips
It’s Okay to Not Be Okay Review — !!Spoilers Ahead!!
I finished watching It’s Okay to Not Be Okay and I am not okay. My heart is still recovering from this emotional wringer. Thank you to writer Park Shin-woo and director Jo Yong for providing such a beautiful ending. Otherwise, I would not be able to write this review.
There are many adjectives that can be used describe It’s Okay to Not Be Okay. Beautiful. Haunting. Funny. Aching. Healing. The subjects of personality disorder, autism, and mental health lead the narrative in a compelling yet sensitive way. I am truly amazed at how writer Park Shin-woo created such an ensemble of unique characters who beautifully play off of each other’s strengths and weaknesses. The use of children’s fairytales to reflect the inner pain of these characters effectively makes that pain more relatable. I wonder if Park Shin-woo teaches a master class in writing? I would take it if she does!
Kang-tae – The Masked Boy
This is my first-time watching a Kim Soo-hyun Kdrama, and will not be my last! My Love from the Star is already on my Kdrama watch list, but I’ve now added at least three more of his projects. (I will skip One Ordinary Day for now. After the sheer number of times his character breaks down in It’s Okay to Not Be Okay, I’m not ready to watch him face that much adversity again 😊). Kang-tae is a character who, on the surface, appears to be a dependable, patient, kind human being. As the series progresses, this façade falls away piece by piece until all his pain and inner turmoil is revealed. Because he has taken care of his older brother all his life, some part of him never grew up. He never had the chance to be a kid, or to have fun. His emotions have been held in for so long that it’s no wonder bull-in-a-china shop Moon-young is able to make him crack.
Moon-Young – The Emotionless Princess
Seo Ye-ji does such a wonderful job of conveying the nuances of Go Moon-young’s character. She manages to express emotionless Moon-young’s thoughts through her eyes and the set of her shoulders. This makes it all the more effective when Moon-young displays emotion. How lovely that Moon-young’s is exactly the person the brothers need in their lives. She is the piece of the puzzle that makes their family work. A large part of Moon-young’s character is the armor she wears. As Dr. Oh tells Kang-tae, people who dress outlandishly are often the most insecure inside and put on clothes as armor. Moon-young’s clothing, jewelry, make-up and hair are a large part of her character– and she is dazzling. I can only image the fashion frenzy caused when this Kdrama came out. Who wouldn’t want some of those gorgeous looks!
Sang-tae – The Box Man
Not surprisingly, Oh Jung-see as Moon Sang-tae won the Baeksang award for best supporting actor in a drama for this role. Sang-tae may have autism, but he displays honesty (often a little too much according to the people around him), intelligence, empathy, terror, childlike wonder, and love. Oh Jung-see’s portrayal is all the more pronounced when compared with the Sang-tae in Kang-tae’s dream. Kang-tae dreams of being in school and seeing beautiful classmate Moon-young. He pursues her, only to have Sang-tae appear, but as a big brother without autism, encouraging his brother not to mess it up with this girl. How aching for Kang-tae to dream of his brother in this form. However, by the end, Sang-tae is everything that younger brother Kang-tae needs and wants in a brother and more.
Supporting Storylines
The supporting characters in It’s Okay to Not Be Okay provide needed breaks from the heavy storyline of the main characters. This includes Publisher Lee Sang-in (Kim Joo-hun) who, despite his drive for financial success shows a kind and caring heart. Immediately smitten with nurse Nam Joo-ri (Park Gyu-young), he takes things slowly with her, allowing her time to get over her crush on Kang-tae. The touch of their pinkie fingers in the final episode adorably echoes the baby steps they have taken toward each other.
Kim Mi-kyung (Heirs/Inheritors) as Gyu-ri’s mother, Kang Soon-deok is a hoot. Given this is the fourth Kdrama I’ve watched where she plays a character’s mother, she must be the actress that everyone wants to cast in the mother role. It’s no wonder. She has a lovely, dry delivery and can somehow lighten any situation. Soon-deok is the person who tells each character like it is, pointing out their flaws and their weakness while at the same time giving them courage and hope. I especially like that she repeatedly expresses how worthless and weak Gang-tae is but that she wants him as her son in her next life anyway
The Laughs
While It’s Okay to Not Be Okay is filled with heart-wrenching moments, there are also many wonderful scenes filled with levity. Anytime Moon-young and Sang-tae fight is hilarious, but especially in the final episode with the fight during the reading of their children’s book. It’s also cute when Moon-young and Sang-tae are working on their book and Moon-young kicks Kang-tae out. Kang-tae thinks that Moon-young pushed him out of the room for an amorous reason and looks completely disappointed when Moon-young goes back into the office before shutting the door on him.
Kang-tae’s Best Tear-jerker Moments
Kang-tae had so many tear-jerker moments it’s almost hard to pick the best one. So, I won’t. I’ll pick three. In Episode 4, Kang-tae tells Moon-young that she is like and empty can and will never understand him. This is followed by him sitting alone in the apartment he shares with Sang-tae, reading a copy of Moon-young’s children’s book, Zombie Kid. Interestingly, Moon-young’s book reminds him how much he wanted his mother’s love. Does he realize as he’s crying that Moon-young actually does understand him?
Kang-tae’s most personal breakdown occurs in episode nine when Sang-tae blurts out in front of the entire hospital staff that Kang-tae wanted him dead. Sang-tae goes on to say that when he fell through the ice, Kang-tae left him to die. Kang-tae melts down in horror at Sang-tae’s words. He cannot believe that Sang-tae remembers this since he has never talked about it. Sadly, he also knows some of what Sang-tae says is true. This makes Kang-tae repeatedly saying “it’s not true” even harder to watch.
Finally, in Episode 14, as Kang-tae grips with the knowledge of who killed his mother, his biggest concern is for Moon-young. Through his heart wrenching emotional collapse, he tells Dr. Oh that he hopes Moon-young never finds out the truth. He wants her to stay an emotionless, empty can. Heavy stuff.
Moon-young’s Best Tear-jerker Moments
For being an emotionless princess, Moon-young has beautiful moments full of emotion. My favorite Moon-young tear-jerker moment comes after she wakes up from a horrible dream about her mother. Kang-tae hears her and runs into her room to comfort her. Hysterical Moon-young doesn’t want him affected by the horror of her mother and tells him to leave her but her fists cling to him. Fortunately, Kang-tae recognizes that her actions don’t match up with her words and he stays until she calms down. I also felt my heart ache for Moon-young as she sits crying against the door in her room after learning of her mother’s crime. This is nicely contrasted with Kang-tae sitting on the other side of the door. His face reflects everything he feels for himself and her in that moment.
The Murder Mystery
If there is one area where I thought It’s Okay to Not Be Okay suffered, it comes after the reveal of the murderer of Kang-tae and Sang-tae’s mother. About mid-way through the series, I suspected that Nurse Park was not who she seemed to be. She came off a little too nosy, a bit to know it all, and occasionally creepy. Still, her transformation from Nurse Park into Moon-young’s mother felt off. I never felt that the characters where in physical danger from her, but maybe that is the point. Despite being a killer, her danger to these characters came from the emotional damage she tried to inflict upon them.
A Lovely Ending for It’s Okay to Not Be Okay
The final episode of the series if filled with everything I hoped it would include and more. Moon-young and Sang-tae publish their book. Dr. Oh gives the brothers and Moon-young a camping car and, after some misdirection, they head off on a wonderful, healing camping trip. During the trip, Moon-young confesses her true love for Kang-tae. Sang-tae realizes that he wants to continue to work as an illustrator and decides to leave his brother and Moon-young to continue the trip on their own. This gives Kang-tae and Moon-young some much needed time alone.
If I had to imagine the future for these characters, I could see Moon-young allowing Kang-tae to fulfill his dream of going to college. She truly loves him now, after all, and would want him to do something that means so much to him. She would go back to writing children’s books, but this time, they would be filled with uplifting stories to share with her and Kang-tae’s own little son, Mung-tae 😊
Random Things I Liked
Kang-tae, walking into the photo studio wearing a dark suit and with his hair slicked back. Queue my jaw hitting the floor.
The black and white vintage movie of Bluebeard complete with its own bloopers!
How the animation at the beginning of series shows the backstory of the soulless girl and faceless boy and nicely sets the tone for the show’s dark, fairytale quality.
It’s Okay to Not Be Okay Soundtrack
The glorious soundtrack from It’s Okay to Not Be Okay, is the mastermind of music director/composer Nam Hye-seung. She created soundtracks for other great Kdrama’s such as Crash Landing on You, Guardian: The Great and Lonely God (Goblin) and Mr. Sunshine. It comes as no surprise that she is highly sought after. Every song and track convey the emotional notes from this drama such as Sew Your Heart, Brother and River of Loneliness. The entire album is going into my Kdrama playlist. Stand-out songs with vocals for me include Halleluja sung by Kim Feel, Janet Suhh’s, In Silence, In Your Time sung by Lee Suhyun, and My Tale performed by Park Won.
